Chapter 4

We go into a bar. Not a bar like I'm used to going to, this is an old one. Not a new fancy cool one, this one is dreary. It smells of old alcohol and mildew. It's so quiet in here. Just the sound from an old jukebox by the bathrooms.
Eddie takes me to the bar and we sit down.
"What are you up to tonight?" the guy at the bar asks Eddie.
"Not much. I made a new friend, so I thought I would show her around. Take her to the places she's probably never seen downtown."
"I bet she hasn't" he replies.
He brings us each a Corona. Eddie picks his up and holds it up to me. "Cheers."
I pick mine up and tap it against his. "Cheers."
Eddie talks to the guy sitting next to him, I just look around at the bar.
So dreary. This is the place you would come to drown your sorrows. It's really very depressing.
"Well what do you think?" Eddie asks me.
"Honestly?"
He nods his head.
"It's very depressing. If I were going to drink myself to death, this would be the place to do it" I tell him.
He smiles. He looks around. "Should we make it a little happier in here?"
"How would we do that?"
He gets up and walks over to the jukebox. He looks at it for a couple minutes and then puts money in. I hear the song change. I've Been Loving You, Otis Redding. He comes back over to me, holds his hand out.
"Will you dance with me?"
I take his hand and follow him. He wraps his arms around me and we dance. He holds me so tight. I put my arms around him, lay my head on his shoulder. He smells so good. I take a deep breath. This feels right. How can it, I don't know him. Like I told him earlier, I don't know anything about him. But right now, it doesn't matter.
I just enjoy him. The way he feels, his wonderful scent.
"The song's over" I hear him say too soon.
I back up a step so I can look at him.
He kisses my forehead. "Thanks."
He takes my hand and we walk back over to the bar where we have new Corona's. We sit and drink them, then he says it's time to go.

We walk a few blocks to a house. I can hear music playing and it seems loud inside. I don't do well with crowds, and loud noise.
"Some of my friends. We won't stay long, I don't think you would enjoy yourself here. Let's just get some smoke, then we can go" he says reading my mind.
We go in a side door, into a kitchen. Some girl runs over to Eddie when she sees him. Hugs him. She tries to kiss him, he turns his head and the kiss lands on is cheek.
"Where have you been? I haven't seen you in months" she says.
"I'm always around somewhere."
"Who is this?" she asks eyeing me.
"This is my Mara."
My Mara?
"Strange to see you with a girl. Like with one girl. You usually have a bunch with you" she says.
He ignores her. "Anybody have any weed?"
"I'm sure Mike will give you some" she says.
We go out into a hall. I can see into the living room, about twenty people are in there. Luckily we go the other way down a hall.
He knocks on a door. "Mikey are you here?"
The door opens, and some guy hugs Eddie and drags him into the room. "Hey asshole, where have you been?"
"Like I told your sister, I'm around."
I take a few steps into the room. I feel so out of place. Eddie grabs my hand and pulls me closer. "Come in, he doesn't bite."
"Who is this sweet little thing?" he asks me.
"I found her lost on the street corner, thought I should take her home" Eddie says. And actually it isn't a lie.
"Aren't you lucky."
"And I hate to just stop by and have to leave, but do you have any weed?" Eddie asks him.
The guy laughs. "I should have known that's what you wanted. Sure."
He gets a box out of his dresser. He gets a bag out of it and brings it to Eddie. He hugs him. "Come see me some day when you have time to talk."
"I will. Thanks" Eddie tells him and we leave through the kitchen.

We share a joint walking back downtown. And then another while waiting to get into a bar.
While we're standing there so many people say Hi to Eddie. Girls hugging him. I really want to grab him and take him to my apartment so I can be alone with him.
Some guy he knows gives us each a beer, then another.
We can hear music playing so we dance right there on the sidewalk.
Another friend of his hands us a bottle of wine.
"Should we just take this and go home?" he asks me.
I nod my head. Three margaritas, four beers and sharing two joints, I just want to be somewhere that I can lay down.
He looks at me and smiles. "Let me get you home."
We start walking but I'm slow.
"How much farther?" I ask him.
"A few blocks. Can you make it? Let me carry you."
"Carry me? How?" I ask.
"Jump on my back" he says and squats down.
Somehow I manage to do it. Being on his back is very hot for some reason. My legs spread apart around him. I know I'm hot and wet, I wonder if he can feel it.
I move my hands down to his chest. I pull his shirt up so I can feel his chest bare. It feels so warm, so smooth. I realize I'm nuzzling his ear, his neck. Kissing his neck, nibbling his ear. I want him so badly.
I reach down to his bare belly. He's so warm. My hands go lower. I feel a trail of hair under his navel. I touch it. Run my fingers up and down it a few times. It feels so nice. Such soft hair. My fingers follow it down one more time. Down until they reach the waistband of his pants. I stick just the very tips of them into his pants. Into his underwear. All I feel is warmth. So much heat. I play with the hairs right inside his pants, start to follow them but his cock is right there. Should I touch it? Is he going to be mad? He didn't seem mad when I stuck my fingers in his pants.
I touch the tip. It's dripping. I get some of the wetness on my fingertips and then run my fingers down the length of his cock. I stroke it a couple times.
He stops at a doorway. I take my hand out of his pants and climb down off of his back. We're kissing. He's digging in his pockets while we kiss."I can't find my fucking key."
"Don't worry about it" I say.
I unfasten his pants. I push his underwear down and pull out his cock. He pushes me against the door. He reaches under my skirt and pulls my underwear down and off. He grabs one of my legs and lifts it up. I put it around his waist.
He takes a step closer to me, he thrusts his cock inside of me. I gasp so loudly. He thrusts inside of me again,this time even harder. Deeper. I throw my head back, it bangs on the door. He keeps thrusting his beautiful cock into me. It seems like each thrust is harder and goes in deeper.
I think I hear music coming from inside. I hope no one is in there and opens the door.
He groans deeply with his next thrust.
I can hear a dog barking somewhere far away. This is slightly surreal. Maybe I'm just really wasted and I'm not really fucking some guy I really don't know in his doorway.
He thrusts in again groaning louder this time. And again. And again.
Ok so maybe this is real.
One last time and this time he's in so deep it's kind of painful. I whimper.
He's still. After a minute I feel his cock slide out of me. He steps back, pulls his clothes back on. He smiles this half smile at me. Shakes his head.
"That was amazing" he says and kisses me. "Thanks Mara."
He takes a deep breath in. "Jesus" he says while letting it out. He kisses me again. This time we kiss for a minute.
He pulls my tank top down in the front. He kisses one nipple, then the other. Bites one. Kisses my neck.
"We should go in, before we start round two" he says.
I smile. "Probably."
He feels around in his pockets again for his keys. "I must have left them inside. No worries though."
He walks over to the window, pushes up the screen, then the window and climbs in.
He unlocks the door and opens it for me. I start to walk in, he leans over and picks something up. He hands me my underwear.
"You might want these" he says.
He picks up the bottle of wine too.
He shuts the door behind us.
"Um...well this is it" he says.
I can't really see much because there's no light on, just a bit of light coming in the open window.
He walks over to the window and shuts the screen.
"Uh...lights would probably help" he says. He walks away from me and turns on a lamp.
I look around. Hmmm...not much of anything. A turntable in the corner, on the floor. Some crates with albums in them.
A guitar case on the floor by them. Two guitars laying on the floor, another on a stand, and an amp.
A sofa. A very well loved sofa. There's a couple pillows on it and a blanket. Maybe he sleeps there. I mean there is also a mattress on the floor, but maybe the sofa is more comfortable.
A cluttered coffee table in front of the sofa. It is covered mostly with notebooks and papers. A couple overflowing ashtrays, some beer bottles, and even an empty pizza box are on it too.
A small kitchen area, and a doorway with a sheet hanging over it. A bathroom? Maybe?
"So?...I know it's not much...but it's home to me" he says.
I kiss him. "It's perfect. Why don't you get us some wine...while I get comfortable."
He kisses me back. "That sounds like a good idea."
He walks over to the counter in the kitchen area and sets the bottle of wine down. He gets two glasses out of the cabinet.
I kick off my sandals and sit on the sofa. He brings the glasses and wine over and sets them on the table. He pours us each a glass of wine, and hands one to me.
He taps his glass to mine. "To us."
I smile. Us. Is there going to be an us? Is this just a tonight thing? I guess it actually doesn't matter.
I drink my whole glass of wine. He fills my glass back up. I drink about half and the room is spinning.
I sit up and try to set my glass on the table, but set it on the edge and it falls on the floor.
"Fuck" I say and laugh.
Eddie starts laughing. He takes off his shirt and throws it on the spilled wine. He sets his glass down.
I lay back on the sofa. I lift up my tank top, play with my nipples, bite my bottom lip.
He pulls the tie on my skirt and unties it.
He takes his shoes and socks off.
He faces me, grabs my ankle closest to the back of the sofa and bends my leg up. My other leg is still on the floor. My skirt falls open. He kisses my knee of my bent leg. Kisses down my thigh.
"I wonder how wonderful my Mara tastes?" he says.
His phone rings.
"Fuck" I say.
"Ignore it" he says.
He bites my belly. Licks my belly button.
We kiss. His hand is on my thigh. He gently runs his fingers up my thigh, to my butt.
"I want to fuck you again" he whispers.
And then his phone rings...again.
We try to ignore it but whoever it is keeps calling. He grabs his phone off the table and looks at it.
"It's Spencer" he says and answers it. He puts it on speaker phone.
"Hey Eddie are you busy?" Spencer asks.
"Uh...yeah" Eddie says and laughs.
"We really seem to have lost Mara. She didn't want to come into the bar. We left her sitting on the curb and she's nowhere to be found now. She won't answer her phone. We're pretty worried. I was hoping you could help us look."
"Um...Mara is missing? Why did you guys just leave her alone?" Eddie asks him.
He looks down at me smiling.
"We were drunk and making stupid choices I guess. But now we're freaking out, so can't you forget what you're doing and come help us look" Spencer says.
"Well I was about to fuck someone. I was seriously about to slide my dick in her, but my damn phone kept ringing..."
"You're such a whore. Weren't you fucking Megan last night, or a few nights ago? Jesus. I'm glad I never set you up with Mara, she's too good for you" Spencer says.
Eddie sighs. "You're an asshole."
Eddie sits down on the sofa, so I get up to find my purse so I can text Amanda and Spencer so they don't think I'm dead.
I must be pretty drunk because I am walking around naked in front of this guy I really don't know. I find my purse by the front door, I get my phone out of it and sit back down by Eddie.
I text Amanda.
'hey i'm not dead. be home later. or tomorrow.'
"I'm not an asshole. Mara is sweet and I thought you and her would be great together, but I guess I forgot what a damn slut you are" Spencer is saying.
Eddie puts his hand on my knee, slides it up my thigh.
"Are you jealous? I think you have a thing for Mara..." Eddie starts to say.
"Wait, Amanda just got a text from her."
"So she's fine, does this mean I can finish what I was doing?" Eddie asks him.
"Sure. Go fuck the snatch you found tonight. Always too busy picking up girls to ever hang out with your friends."
Eddie laughs. He picks up his glass of wine and drinks the rest. He sets his glass down and pours more in his glass, picks my glass up and fills it for me.
He hands me my glass. I drink some of it. I get a text from Amanda.
'where are you?are you ok? where the hell did you go?'
I drink more wine. I really want to drop my phone and say fuck it to everyone tonight. Everyone but this gorgeous man sitting next to me.
I reply to Amanda.
'i'm fine. little drunk. going to sleep. see you tomorrow.'
I set my phone on the back of the sofa.
Eddie drinks his whole glass of wine.
"Hey you never know, this girl might be my soul mate" Eddie tells Spencer.
I finish my glass of wine, drop my glass on the floor. Luckily it doesn't break. I lean over and kiss Eddie. I suck on his bottom lip as I pull away. I reach down and unfasten his pants. I stick my hand into his underwear. Sadly he's not really hard. I look at him and pout.
He smiles. "Take care of  that for me" he whispers to me.
I wrap my hand around his cock. I play with the tip of it, rub my thumb around it a few times. I lean over and nibble on his ear lobe.
"I really want to feel this in me again" I say as I stroke my hand up and down his cock. It feels kind of strange that he's getting hard while I touch him.
"Spencer I really need to go. You know what, tomorrow we'll do something. Call me when you get up. Right now though...I gotta go" Eddie says and hangs up. He sets his phone on the table.
He stands up and drops his pants and underwear. He picks me up and carries me to the mattress. He lays me down in the middle.
He lays next to me. Kisses me on the lips. He caresses my ear, then slowly glides his hand down my neck, down to one of my nipples. He plays with it for a few minutes. His fingers travel down further, into my navel. He keeps circling his finger around my navel, and it tickles so badly. It gives me chills.
"You have goosebumps my little Mara" he says.
I pout at him again. "I need you."
He smiles his half assed smile. "Yeah? Well...I think I need you too."
I pull him to me. He lays on me.
"You're so beautiful" I say.
He laughs. "So are you."
"I watched you. Last night. Tonight."
"I know. I saw you. I kept telling everyone, see that girl, I'm going to get her. And now I have you. I may never let you go."
He raises his hips off of me and thrusts his beautiful cock deep inside of me. I raise my hips to meet his.
He thrusts in deeper and deeper. My hips meet his with each thrust.
We kiss, then he leans down and bites one of my nipples. Then the other one.
He thrusts in deep. I know he's cumming. He whimpers in my ear. I rub his back. Play with his curls.
We lay still. Him half way on me. We cuddle up together. He nuzzles my neck, my ear.
"Sorry" he says.
"It's fine. Next time" I reply.

Chapter 3

I slowly follow my friends. I take one last time to turn back and look at my beautiful musician. He's playing his guitar again. The singer girl isn't singing this time. She's in front of him, facing him, dancing very closely. Very seductively. He's smiling, then laughs.
He is the biggest tease I've ever known.

We find Spencer easily when we walk into the restaurant.
"Oh my god I am fucking starving!" he says when we sit down.
"Yeah, what's new" I say teasing him. I sit right across from him.
"Oh my Mara, speaking her mind. I like that" he replies.
"Shall we get nachos?" I ask him.
Me and him love nachos and almost always share an order.
"Of course."
 When the waitress comes over to take our order we get a loaded nachos to share, but I'm not sure what else to get. I love Mexican food. I get a couple tacos and some rice. And a frozen margarita.
The place is packed and by the time the nachos are on the table I'm on my second margarita. My third when the rest of my food comes. Needless to say, I only eat a bite or two of my tacos.

We don't hang around the restaurant tonight, it's too crowded. When we get outside I'm so heartbroken to see he's gone. I wonder where he went and if the singer is with him. I wonder if I'll ever see him again.
We start walking down the street. Everyone wants a drink, but all the places are crowded.
We come to a place near the end of the downtown area, only a couple blocks left of bars, restaurants and cool little shops. It's not too crowded, only a handful of people in line to get in so they decide to wait here.
I just want to find my guitar player. I'm a little drunk and that always makes me despondent. I need proof that he's real. I dig around in my purse trying to find the guitar pick. Maybe he didn't really give it to me, maybe I imagined it.
I keep digging around, but don't feel it. It has to be in there. It has to be real. I couldn't have imagined it.
Amanda notices me frantically digging around in my purse. "What are you looking for?"
"I dropped something in here earlier, but I can't seem to find it."
"Oh. Well what is it? Are you sure you put it in there?" she asks.
"Yeah, I don't know what else I would have done with it. It has to be here" I say.
I sit down on the curb and dump my purse out next to me.
"What is so important that you're looking for?" she asks me.
I never carry much in my purse, especially when I go out. Small wallet with ID, debit card and cash. Lip balm. A couple tampons and pads. Hair things in case my hair starts driving me crazy. My phone. And a pen as back up to write down a phone number if my phone dies.
I keep digging through my small pile of stuff. Where is it?
"Hey pick up your stuff, come on, it's our turn to go in" Amanda tells me.
I don't even want to go. I really want to go home now.
"Go ahead. I don't want a drink."
"I'm not leaving you out here alone" she says.
"I'm fine. I'm just going to sit here and then maybe go home, or I'll come in."
"There's no way we're letting you walk home alone."
"If I decide to leave, I'll call a cab. And I'll call you to let you know. Go ahead, I'm fine" I tell her.
She looks at me. "I don't feel right about this."
"I'm fine. Just go."
She sighs. Turns and goes inside with our friends.
I dig through my stuff again. It's not here. Where did it go? Did I imagine it, or lose it? Did I imagine him? Damn how drunk am I? I feel tears run down my cheeks. What a perfect Saturday night. Maybe I should have stayed with Seth, ugly dick and all. He really was nice. I'm a really shitty person to break up with him for that.
"Hey are you ok?" I hear a beautiful deep voice ask.
I look up, it's him. My musician. My beautiful musician. Now he has all of his hair hidden away under a ballcap he's wearing backwards. His guitar slung over his back.
I wipe the tears off my cheeks. "I'm fine."
He squats down in front of me. "You're a really bad liar. What's wrong? Anything I can do to help?"
I shake my head. "I'm fine."
He smiles. "You're not.'
He stands up. I see his hand reaching down to me. I take it and he helps me up.
"What can I do to help?" he asks.
"Nothing, really. I'm fine."
"I was about to go get coffee, why don't you come with me" he says.
I take a deep breath. You can do this, you know you want to, I tell myself. I look at him. At his perfectly beautiful face. Right into those eyes. Blue eyes. Such an amazing shade of blue. So calming. I nod my head, and smile.
He smiles back. "Perfect. Come on" he says and takes my hand.
We start walking down the street.
I'm confused when we walk past the last coffee shop downtown. Confused but very relieved. It's always so crowded, like it was when we passed it.
"Where are we going? I thought you said coffee?" I ask him.
"Not in there. All those pretentious jerks, I don't go there. I have another place I go."
I'm suddenly a little nervous. I don't even know a thing about him except that his name may or may not be Ed.
We walk a couple more blocks until we come to a diner. Like a greasy diner straight out of a fifties movie.
He holds the door open for me and we go in. We walk to a booth. I sit on one of the bench seats, he sets his guitar down on the other one and slides in next to it.
We both turn our coffee cups over and wait for the waitress.
"Better?" he asks me.
I nod my head. And honestly I already do feel better, because now I know he's real and I'm here with him.
The waitress pours us coffee. "Do you want anything else?" she asks.
He looks over at me.
"Um...."
"Maybe in a little while. After we've had our coffee" he tells her.
"Ok. Just call me over when you do" she says and leaves.
I take a drink of my coffee I look across the table at him. Right into those deep blue eyes. He smiles that smile he has. The one that makes me smile.
"So, do your friends really call you Ed?" I ask him.
"They do. Ed or Eddie. And you're?"
"Mara."
"Mara the meek" I swear I hear him say.
"What?" I ask him.
"Oh it's nothing. I have this friend and he has been trying to set me up with this girl. He's always telling me how shy she is. Always saying something about my meek little Mara, Or calls her Mara The Meek" he explains.
"Spencer is an asshole" I say.
He looks surprised. "So you are that Mara. Mara The Meek."
I sigh embarrassed. "I guess so ."
"Spencer is an asshole" he says.
I don't know what to say now. I really just want to crawl under the table and cry.
"Are you ok?" I hear him ask me.
I can't look up. I can't look at him. I know my face is red, it feels so flushed.
He reaches over and holds my hand. Squeezes it.
"You know Spencer. He doesn't mean to say stupid stuff, it just seems to come out. I bet he said stupid stuff about me to you. Let's forget about him" he says.
I wonder what Spencer said about me? And he never really said anything to me about Eddie, just wanted to set me up with him.
I nod my head.
His phone rings, he looks at it. Smiles. "Guess who."
"Hey Spencer what's up?"
"Thought I would see if you can hang out" Spencer says.
"Sorry not tonight. I um...I'm busy."
"I guess I'll give up trying to set you and Mara up. I think you're perfect for each other, but neither of you seem interested. And you're always too freaking busy. We seem to have lost Mara anyway."

"You lost her?" Eddie asks.

"Not really lost I guess, I think she's outside."

"Maybe you better go check. I need to go anyway, like I said I'm busy" Eddie tells him.

"They still think you're sitting outside" he tells me.

"Should I call? What should I tell them?"

"Tell them you ran into an old friend. Or made a new one" he suggests.
I get my phone out and call Amanda.
"Hey I um...I'm going to hang out with a friend, so I'll see you later at home" I say.
"I can't really hear you, it's loud in here. So I'll see you later" she says loudly, and hangs up.
I put my phone back in my purse.
"That was quick" he comments.
"She said she couldn't hear me so she hung up."
The waitress comes over to refill our coffee.
"Do you want anything else?" she asks us.
Eddie looks at me, I shake my head.
"I guess not. Thanks" Eddie replies.
"Ok. Enjoy your evening" she says and walks away.
"So what are you going to do tonight?" he asks me.
I shrug my shoulders. "It's late, probably should just go home."
"It's early. We've got all night. Let me show you all my favorite places."
"I don't know you. I don't know anything about you" I say.
"Spencer knows me. Trust me. Trust your gut, what does it say?" he asks.
"Where are we going?" I ask him.
"Everywhere. Are you ready?"
I look at him. I try to read his face. Look at his eyes. He looks safe. I think I can trust him.
I stand up. "Are you ready?"
He gets up, gets a ten out of his pocket and lays it on the table. Picks up his guitar and we head to the door.

When we get outside he takes one of my hands and we start walking down the sidewalk. Walking away from the downtown area. I wonder where we're going. I think about asking, but decide I'd rather be surprised.
"I'm going to stop at a friend's and drop my guitar off" he says.
We walk quietly a couple blocks. He stops at a small building.
"She lives here. Do you want to come with me?" he asks.
I really don't want to stand here alone, but I wonder who this 'she' is.
"Is it ok if I come?" I ask him.
"Yeah. I can introduce you too" he says.
We go inside, into a really dark hallway. "Sorry the light is always burned out."
He takes my hand so I don't get lost.
He knocks, then opens the door. "It's just me" he says.
"It's Saturday night, shouldn't you be out having fun?" I hear a voice say.
We go inside. There's an older lady sitting on a sofa in there.
"I am. Just wanted to drop my guitar off, if that's ok" he tells her.
"Only if you play me a song when you pick it up" she replies.
He smiles. "You know I will."
He takes his hat off and puts it on her head. "You can keep this for me too."
All of his beautiful curls fall down around his shoulders.
"So is this someone new?" she asks, about me I guess.
I look at Eddie, he actually seems like he's blushing.
"Yeah. This is Mara" he tells her.
"Mara this is my friend Margaret" he says to me.
"Hi" I manage to say.
"Let me see your hand" she says to me.
I hold my right hand out to her. She takes it in both of her hands. She just holds it for a minute.
"I like this one. She's good. Keep her" she says to Eddie.
I think he's blushing even more. "I like her too."
"You show her a good time tonight. And be a gentleman" she says.
"Of course" he tells her.
He sets his guitar down in a chair, then leans over and kisses Margaret on the cheek. "I'll call you tomorrow and let you know when I'll be over."
"Have fun" she says when we're leaving.

When we get outside he grabs my hand and we start running. I can't keep up.
"Eddie, I'm wearing sandals, I can't run that fast."
He stops.
"Why are we running anyway?" I ask him.
He grabs me, pulls me to him. Kisses me. Kisses me so hard.  I kiss back just as hard. His tongue suddenly in my mouth. And then just as quickly as it happened, it's over.
He takes my hand and we start walking down the sidewalk. I still have no idea where we're going or what he has planned. I'm excited and a little scared.

Chapter 2

I stumble into the kitchen in the morning. Amanda is already sitting at the counter eating breakfast. I'm not a morning person at all. Or just not an easy to wake up person no matter what time it is.
I grab my box of FrankenBerry off the top of the refrigerator and sit down by her.
"There's coffee" she says.
I give her a sad look that means yes I would love coffee but there is no way I can get up and get it right now.
"And yes I will get you a cup" she says.
She pours me a cup of coffee and brings it to me. "Do you want a bowl? Milk? Spoon? Anything for your cereal?"
I shake my head.
I stick my hand in the box, get a handful out and cram it into my mouth. I need sugar.
I take a drink of my coffee. So hot and delicious. I lay my head down on the counter.
"Why don't you eat some of what I'm having. So much better for you. That shit is killing you slowly" she says.
I sit up and look to see what she's eating. Looks like yogurt with all kinds of crap in it. Drinking some slimey looking green goo. Like she put frogs in the blender and chopped them all up.
Don't get me wrong, I love fruits and veggies, but not all mushed up together. And not in the morning when I need sugar and strong coffee.
I reach in my box of cereal, get another handful, and cram them in my mouth.
"I have no idea why you don't have a boyfriend" she says teasing me.
"I don't know" I reply with my mouth still half full.
"Michelle called and wants to know what we're doing tonight, so any ideas?" she asks me.
I shrug my shoulders. Of course my brain is screaming GO TRY TO FIND THE SEXY MUSICIAN WITH THE MAN BUN.
"I guess I'll call Spencer and see if he wants to come, or meet us somewhere. Really you have no ideas of what to do tonight? Should we just hang out here?" she asks.
NOOOOOOOOO my brain is screaming. I'll never see him here.
I casually shrug my shoulders. "I don't know, last night was kind of ok. Just hanging out downtown. We could go eat and just hang out again."
"I don't know if Spencer will, he was kinda pissy when he got lost."
"Yeah. We can ask I guess. Or maybe Michelle has an idea" I say but secretly think, I'm going to look for my man!
Amanda dials Spencer's number. She puts him on speaker phone. "Hey sexy, are you up?"
"Um...yeah...sort of I guess. Probably not as awake as you, but more awake than Mara. Why? What's going on? Is it even noon yet?" he asks.
"You're an asshole Spencer" I say.
"Yes I know. You tell me at least once a day."
"So asshole...plans for tonight?" Amanda says.
"Well I can call my friend..." he says.
"Spencer, do it and I will never talk to you again" I say.
"You need some sex in your life. Meet him and at least fuck him. I think it will change your whole outlook on life" he says.
"I'm not having a random fuck with your friend."
"Just give her a friend fuck" Amanda tells Spencer.
"NO!" me and Spencer say at the same time.
We all laugh.
"I don't need a friend pity fuck thank you very much. And it hasn't been that long. When did I break up with that dude?" I ask them.
"Which one?" Amanda asks.
"That one, you know. Um...that guy. He was um...nice" I say.
"That like really dirty hippie dude? He was nice, what happened to him?" Amanda asks.
I don't want to say, so I just shrug my shoulders.
"Yeah what happened with him, did he get too wasted and is lost somewhere in the city?" Spencer asks.
"Who knows" I say.
"What did you do?" Amanda asks me.
I try to look sweet and innocent. "What do you mean?"
"What happened? What did you do? You broke up with him didn't you?" she asks.
"Is my meek little Mara being bad?" Spencer asks.
"I didn't do anything" I protest.
"She did something, you shoud see the smirk on her face" Amanda tells him.
I cram cereal in my mouth so I can't talk.
"She's stuffing her mouth full of her trashy cereal so she can't answer us" Amanda tells Spencer.
"Fine, she won't tell us. I think I need to go. I'm going to call my friend, set them up for tonight. What time works for you Mara?"
"I didn't like his dick ok. It was just not pretty. I know every time I saw it I made a face. And the thought of it in me was just like eww, so I told him I was gay and didn't want to fuck any more, or that we should break up."
Amanda looks at me like she doesn't believe me. Only silence from Spencer.
Then Amanda starts laughing.
"Wow. I don't know what to say" Spencer says.
"So what are we doing tonight? Can we ever stay on the subject?" I ask.
"I'll be over in a couple hours, we'll figure it out then" Spencer says.
"Are you bringing anyone?" I asked, kind of scared, kind of curious.
"Dave will probably want to hang out again, and yeah I might call my other friend. Just to hang out with us, I promise I won't try to set you guys up, but you can meet and see what you think. Ok?" he asks.
"Sure."
"And if she doesn't like him she can just tell him he has an ugly dick" Amanda says laughing.
"Fucking assholes" I say. I grab my box of cereal and wander back to my room.

I lay on my bed eating dry cereal off and on while messing around on my phone. I text my mom to let her know I'm still alive, then I call my older sister Beth.
"Hey" I say when she answers.
"Hey. You do know that if you're not here for dinner tomorrow night mom is going to probably make you a plate and invade your sanctuary" she tells me.
"Oh god no. I was there like a couple weeks ago. Why is she coming?"
"It was actually several months ago. Fourth of July, it's almost October now. So I suggest you get your ass here" she says.
"Shit. Yeah I guess I will" I say.
"So what have you been so busy with that you can't come see your family?" she asks.
"I don't know, just nothing I guess. Stuff. But nothing really."
"Well that explains it" she says laughing.
"Just work, coming home, going out some nights. The weekend mostly."
"Is that what you're doing tonight?" she asks.
"Yeah. Probably having dinner, then hang around downtown."
"Who all is going? Are you still with that one guy, um...Seth?" she asks.
Oh yeah Seth, that's what his name was.
"No. It just wasn't working. Spencer keeps trying to set me up with one of his friends, but you know he has to be some loser if he needs set up."
"Well you do realize that you saying that means you're calling yourself a loser too, since he's trying to set you up."
"What an asshole. I never thought of that. It doesn't matter anyway I told him no way. It's just going to be me, Amanda, Michelle, Spencer and maybe a couple of his friends. No set up though, I told him no."
"Spencer is just trying to be nice. You know how he is, just wants to take care of everyone.Wants everyone to be happy" she says.
"Yeah."
My phone beeps, someone is calling me. I look to see who it is. Michelle.
"Hey Michelle is calling me so I need to go. I'll be there tomorrow though. Bye."
"Yes Michelle."
"What are you wearing tonight?" she asks me.
"I don't know, did anyone ever decide where we're going? What we're doing?"
"Well no, but I was going to wear these cute shorts I have but I need some sandals, can I borrow a pair of yours?" she asks,
"Yeah you can wear some of mine. You know, last night we went downtown, ate and then just hung out. Watched some of the people playing music. Just walked around. It was fun. We could just do that again."
"That's fine with me as long as I can drink. Did they give you guys any shit? Did you drink?" she asks.
"No. No one said anything to us. We did lose Spencer and Dave for about an hour though, but we eventually remembered we could just call Spencer and ask him where they were. It was fun. I thought we could do that, then maybe come back here and I don't know, do whatever."
"Sounds fine to me. I'm going to eat something, shower and then I'll be over, so in about an hour. Bye."
"Bye."

I get up to see if there's any coffee left.
Amanda is in the living room painting her toenails. I get coffee and sit next to her on the sofa.
"Michelle's going to be here in like an hour."
"Yeah? What are we doing?" she asks.
"I told her we had fun last night just doing nothing. She seemed ok with doing that."
"Yeah. Cool. I guess I better shower after my nails are dry."
"I called Beth and she says I haven't been home since the Fourth Of July. She said if I don't go tomorrow that my mom will come here to check on me. So guess where I'm going tomorrow."
"Fun."
"Yeah."
I sit there and drink my coffee.

I realize an hour later I'm still sitting there just spacing out. Amanda left to shower and get dressed about thirty minutes ago.
Someone knocks on the door. That's strange, no one knocks on our door ever. Well none of our friends. I guess I better see who it is. All I have on is a little tank top and someone's boxers. Spencer's probably. Couldn't be Seth's he didn't wear underwear. He really should have to keep his ugly dick covered.
I look through the peephole. Some guy, no idea who it is.
I open the door and look at the guy suspiciously.
"Oh hey um...you are either Amanda or Mara. Let me guess...Mara" he says.
I look at him, raise my eyebrows. Who the fuck is this.
"I'm Spencer's friend. He told me to meet him here. Well at first. But he just called me and said to tell you he's going to meet all of us downtown, but was hoping it's ok if I come with you guys" he says.
"Spencer's friend?"
That fucking asshole. I am going to kill him when I see him.
"Yeah. Um...I hope it's ok" he says.
"Who are you talking to?" I hear Amanda ask.
She comes to the door.
"Hi. I'm Spencer's friend. He told me to meet him here, but now he just wants to meet us all downtown. If that's ok if I come with you guys" he tells her.
"Spencer's friend?" she asks.
"Um yeah. Spencer's friend" he says again.
"Sorry. Come in. Mara has no manners." she tells him.
"I have no manners? What about Spencer?" I say.
"See. No manners. Sit down. Do you want a drink or anything?" she asks him.
"No I'm fine. Sorry to just show up. He was going to call one of you, I guess he hasn't yet" he says.
"It's ok" Amanda says.
Michelle comes in. She has no shoes on.
"You came over here barefoot?" I ask her.
"Yeah. I didn't see any reason to wear any shoes since I was borrowing yours."
She sees the stranger in our living room. "Oh hey who are you? I'm Michelle."
"Hi. I'm Matt. Spencer's friend" he says.
"Spencer's friend ?" she asks us.
"We don't know" Amanda says.
"I'm going to go get dressed." I wander to my room. If Spencer really sent his friend he's trying to set me up with here, I'm never talking to him again.
I dig through my closet that is really such a mess. Pretty much I went through this last night, looking through my clothes and what I didn't like was tossed on the floor, or my bed.
I put on my favorite brown silk hippie wrap skirt. I try to find the brown tank top that matches it and I can't. I do find a green one and decide it matches well enough since there's green in the skirt. I find a pair of sandals and slide them on.
I stand in front of my dresser mirror and brush my hair. I decide to put it up so I twist it up into a bun and put in a barrette to hold it up.
"I need sandals" Michelle says coming into my room.
"Yeah there's some here, somewhere."
"Somewhere? Like can you give me an idea where" she says.
"Under my bed, bottom of my closet. Or scattered on my floor. Sorry. You know I'm a slob."
"So did Spencer call? Is this the guy he's been trying to set you up with?" she asks.
"I haven't heard anything from him. Call him and ask him for me. Please? If you do, I'll look for my sandals" I tell her.
"Deal" she says and calls Spencer.
I get down on my knees and start looking for sandals. I try to sort of listen to her side of the conversation, but sort of not.
"Hey who's the guy you sent over here?" she asks.
"Yeah Matt, we got that" she says a minute later.
I find a sandal and toss it over by her feet. I keep looking. I know I have two or three other pairs besides the ones I'm wearing.
"He just keeps saying he's your friend so you know what Mara is thinking" she says.
I find two more sandals and toss them to her. Sadly none of them match.
"Ok yeah I'll tell her because I think she's ready to kill you" she says.
I find one under my bed and toss it with the others.
I head for my closet.
"Alright. Yeah I think we're leaving soon so see you there in a little while" she says and hangs up.
I find the last two sandals in the bottom of my closet and toss them over with the rest.
"So?" I ask her.
"So. He says no this isn't that friend. He actually did call that guy to see if he could come tonight but he said he already had plans, but he might be able to meet up later. Depends on what happens tonight. This is just another friend, but he is single if any of us are interested" she explains.
"Well good for him, I guess. Well no not really since he did try to get the guy to come. Will you explain to him tonight that I really hate to be set up. I get so uncomfortable. And tell him I don't need to get laid."
I get up and walk over to where she is, sitting on my bed. I sit next to her.
She leans over and kisses me. We kiss for a minute. Her hand on my thigh, moving under my skirt.
"You need sex? We have time" she says.
I smile and shake my head. "Thanks but no. I don't want friend pity sex."
Amanda comes in my room. "Are you guys hiding from this guy? Any idea what's going on yet?"
"I called Spencer. Matt is just one of his friends. Not the friend. He is single though, if you're interested" Michelle tells her.
She blushes.
"Oh my god you are!" I say.
"Maybe."
"Cute. Ok let me pick a pair of sandals and we can go if everyone is ready" Michelle says.
"Yeah. Where are we meeting Spencer? Matt said he wasn't sure."
"He said same place you guys ate at last night if that's ok" Michelle says.
I smile. Yes! Hopefully my little guitar player will be at the same place pretty near there.

About forty five minutes later and we're all ready and walking downtown. I keep my ears open for music, especially guitar music.
And then I see him. We're across the street, perfect place for me to stand and watch and hopefully he won't see me.
"Oh it's those one people from last night that you liked, isn't it?" Amanda asks me.
"Yeah I think so."
God he looks even more beautiful tonight. His gorgeous curls hanging down. I watch his fingers as he plays his guitar. So mesmerizing. I wonder how they would feel touching me like that.
They finish the song. A couple girls that had been standing near walk closer to him. One talks to him. Smiles. Flirts. He smiles and talks back. They talk for a minute. He reaches in his shirt pocket and gets something out and hands it to her. I can't figure out what it could be at first, then I realize it's a guitar pick. The other girl looks at it and then says something to him, and he gives her one. I guess she asked for it. Yuck. Maybe he's some egotistical asshole. I can see that. I look around, almost everyone standing around watching them are girls.
"Are we ready to go? Spencer just sent me a text wondering where we are" Matt says.
I sigh. Yeah we need to go. No reason to stand and watch the most perfect human in the world because he's probably a jerk in real life.
We have to walk right past them to get to the restaurant. I cautiously look at him as we cross the street. Taking little sneaky looks so he doesn't catch me again. He's so beautiful up close. Breathtakingly beautiful.
While we're walking by I keep my eyes down and my face turned so he doesn't see me and recognize me from last night.
I feel someone grab my hand. I look back, he has a hold of it. My little musician. I look at our hands, mine in his now. He looks at me and smiles.
I pull my hand away and keep walking. I realize he put something in it. I look down to see what it is. A guitar pick? What? Why? Does he think I'm one of his little groupies? Happy to have any little crumb he might toss my way. I start to turn around and throw it at him, then I turn it over and realize it says something on the back.
                                                              MY
                                                          FRIENDS
                                                          CALL ME
                                                               ED  
Did he want me to know his name? Maybe he's not a stupid egotistical jerk. We cross the street. I turn around to look at him again. Some girl is talking to him. He's smiling. He turns his head and looks at me. Raises his eyebrows. I know I'm smiling at him even though I don't want to. I don't know him enough to know if he deserves a smile from me. He could be a stuck up asshole.
"Come on. What are you looking at?" Amanda asks grabbing my hand and dragging me away.                  

Chapter 1

"You could just meet him," Spencer says for about the millionth time. 
"No. Just forget about it. I don't want to be set up with anyone. I don't care who it is." I tell him for probably the millionth time.
"He's really nice," Spencer says.
"Great. Then he doesn't need your help  finding someone."
"I give up!" he says finally.
"So what are we doing tonight?" Amanda asks us.
I'm actually happy just to stay home tonight. Hanging out with my two best friends.
"Food. I'm starving," Spencer says.
"You're always starving" I mumble.
"What was that? Meek Little Mara, you can't be a sarcastic bitch and be meek about it. You have to be a loud mouthed bitch," he says.
"Her? Never," Amanda says.
I sigh. "What are we doing tonight?"
"Let's just go hang out downtown. Walk around, get something to eat. A few drinks," he says. "And then maybe you'll want to meet my friend," he says to me.
"Is he hot? Set me up with him if he is," Amanda says.
"He's hot I guess. All the girls always seem to think so," he starts to say.
"Ok yeah, so not my type. Sounds like a stuck up douchebag," I say.
"He's not though. He's...well he's...he umm...needs someone...special," he says.
"Ok forget it. Sounds too complicated to me already," Amanda tells him.
"He needs the perfect person. And he'll be perfect for her," Spencer says.
"And her foot fits the shoe, he kisses her awake, blah blah blah. There are no perfect world fairy tales. Life sucks and you die. And if you're lucky you have some good times, and great friends," I say.
"Aren't you just a ray of sunshine tonight," he says to me.
Spencer leans close to Amanda. "Let's get her laid. I think it's been way too long."

I go find my sandals and sit on my bed to put them on. Why is Spencer so insistent about me meeting his friend. He's tried to a couple times before, but I'm not interested. I'm really picky. Maybe. Or maybe I just want to be free to do what I want.
Honestly...I think everyone thinks me and Spencer will end up together, even my parents. I've know him for years, since we were in high school together. He's the sweetest guy I've ever known. Kind, and very generous. And yes he's very nice looking.
In high school he kept his dirty blond hair long, but now he keeps it super short. He has me shave his head about every six weeks keeping his hair under an inch long.
He always has a goatee, well almost always, sometimes he gets too bothered to keep nice facial hair and just shaves it all off.
When I said he was sweet and kind, I think it's because he has these beautiful hazel eyes that make him look sweet and kind. I mean, he really is sweet and kind too, but his eyes really portray that.
BUT we'll never be anything more than friends...best friends. I love him dearly, but I'm not in love with him. I don't have those kind of feelings for him.
Amanda pokes her head in my room. "Are you ready, Spencer is starving," she says and laughs.
"Yeah, give me a minute," I reply.
I really don't feel like going anywhere. This loser friend of Spencer's better not show up. If Spencer set me up I'm going to be pissed.

We walk down the street to find somewhere to eat.
After sitting and eating, and drinking for nearly three hours, I honestly don't care if Spencer wants to set me up or not. I am feeling no pain at all. Not drunk, just in a good mood.
We run into a friend of Spencer's, not the friend though. I have to admit, I'm relieved, but a little sad too.
The four of us walk around. There's a lot going on in the streets at night. Drinking even though you're not supposed to have open containers. A lot of entertainers. Somehow we lose Spencer and his friend Dave.
We stand on a corner watching for Spencer and Dave to come by, but also watching the people playing. Two guys and a girl. The girl is singing, one guy playing a drum, the other playing guitar.
The guitar player is gorgeous. I swear when I first saw him, time slowed down. I heard angels singing and harps playing. Our eyes locked and neither of us could look away.
In reality though, I thought he was hot, stared at him, ran into the back of Amanda when she stopped and made a fool of myself. Mr Guitar player smiled and slightly laughed. I turned a million shades of red and looked away quickly.
We stay there trying to find Spencer and Dave and yes I watch Mr Beautiful Guitar Player too. He really is beautiful. And seems to be a pretty good guitar player. He is so tiny, at least compared to the other guy. He isn't much taller than the girl. Both are taller than me, not by much.
It's getting kind of chilly now that the sun is going down. I still wore sandals and shorts though, I always dress wrong for the weather, but dress to be cute. He was much smarter, although his clothing choices are a bit strange. He has on shorts, but some sort of leggings, or long underwear on under the shorts. A short sleeve tee, but under it is either a long sleeve tee or a long underwear shirt.
Slouchy boot socks and old banged up Dr Martens complete his outfit.
They finish the song. He pulls up a bunch of his hair to the top, sorta back of his head and puts it into a messy little man bun. I don't normally like men with ponytails, or a man bun, but I think I may have gasped when he put his hair up. His hair was beautiful before. Long, curly, brown hair. Down a little past his shoulders. Curly, but very messy too. I would say it hasn't seen a brush in a long time. But now all pulled up, well most of it pulled up, into this messy little man bun, it's even more beautiful if that's possible.
They all talk for a minute before starting another song. I really hope we don't see Spencer any time soon. I know that makes me a horrible person, but I could watch this guitar player all night.
"Should we go look for them?" Amanda asks me.
I shrug my shoulders. "Let's give them a little more time. At least until this song is over."
"Yeah? You like them?" she asks me looking over at my guitar player and his friends.
"They seem ok."
She watches, listens for a minute. "Yeah, maybe."
I watch this little man. This little adorable man. He seems to be having fun. And I am having fun watching him. He leans over and says something to the girl. She smiles at him. I wonder if there's something going on between them? She says something to him, he looks up at me, smiles, then looks back at her. Oh my god he must have noticed me watching him. I want to die now.
"We should probably go" I tell Amanda.
"What? Why now? Do you see them?" she asks.
"Come on" I say grabbing her hand and pulling her down the street. "We can just call him."
"Oh yeah. Why didn't we think of that before?"
I call Spencer and we meet him and Dave at a place down the street. We all walk back to our apartment.
We all drink a little when we get there. They all talk, I can't get my mind off of my little guitar player. He was just so cute. I wonder if he's down there often playing guitar? Wonder if he'll be there tomorrow? I wonder if him and the girl are together? I hope not! Of course I'll never do anything but stand and stare at him, from farther away next time so he can't see me. I wish I wasn't so shy, but I am and probably always will be.